WHAT IS LIFE IF FULL OF CARE ?
Wow! That was some journey. Bit longer than anticipated but there it is and there we have it.
But I am back to let you know that I can still rock and roll.
Do you love me?
Blame it on the buxom wench I do.

THE TRIAL, LIFE, and ADHOCRACY
Due to conditions out of control your blessed Zola must travel again. I guess it will take about two days of continuous boredom and suffering.

If I get another young teenager jerk asking me to show me passport and all that - if I get another privatised mercenary trying to get under my skin - I really think I shall whack em.

Hope to be back by Tuesday - so take care out there you bad boys and gals.

WHY ANTICANT and THE MERKIN ARGUE as TROUSERS DITHERS
It is all to do with the "Frontal Lobes" ...................

SOMETHING QUITE DIFFERENT NOW
After a blog concerning Southwold your poor Zola is taken to the cleaners by subversives ( even when the Proms is just about to go pubic). But your Zola listens to public feedback.
So let us reflect and reasonably debate upon the latest sighting of Ronnie Wood ( Anticant; he is a member of the Rolling Stones band who used to be a Small Face and that is all you need to know) and his rehab jolly jaunt in Southwold a few years ago ( forgive my time memory a day sometimes becomes a year or even a year into the present ) where, according to St Felix School borders, all borders were crossed and trangressed as sex was the healer of lost souls.

DAMN IT - THIS REALLY TAKES THE PRINGLE

PM Brown is taking his summer hols in me beloved Southwold.

FUNDING EVENTS COMING UP SOON
My saucy sources tell me that two fund raising events are planned :-

1. A Millwall football team is to play the "Best of NuLabor". All proceeds will go to the National Health Service Reform Fund.

2. A Hull Rugby team is due to play against the "Best of the Guardian". All proceeds will go to the "Guardian America Project".

Have you heard of any other events that might interest us?

LET THEM EAT CAKE OR PRINGLES
After Gawdi Broon did his Queen Victoria bit we are all now OK. The spuds are not where it is all at.
Pringles ( you know Pringles and Proctor and Gamble and all that) are no longer classified as "crisps" or "potato chips". They are now closer to good old brown bickies or at least multi-cultural wholesome-ness food.
As the taxes go down so too will the price of Pringles, they all say.

Best buy ? Easy : Gin and Pringles please.

SOMETHING FISHY GOING ON HERE
Six feet were found recently washed up on Canada's Pacific coast.
Rumour had it that the attached socks were from Marks and Sparks.

Now, in the south of Sweden, a shoe has been found washed up on the shore. There was a foot in it too.
The local Swedish police have refused to disclose the shoe manufacturer but admitted that it had an Italian look about it.
The United Nations has sent a statement to the press concerning this new wave of lost members. One paragraph was aimed clearly at respectable ladies and others of that bent. It said : " Ladies, when walking along the beach, are advised not to even look at condoms on the waterside. "

YOU ARE NICKED DRUNKEN IN CHARGE OF A LAWNMOWER
Before you get at me and abuse my self-esteem I would like to say that our good Anticant speeding around the posh areas of London is OK and his wheelie-chair is OK too ( it has a laptop attached).
So too with our Trousers and his sexy bicycle things. All OK.
Just about OK is our Merkin who always seems to end up in trouble when he takes a supermarket trolly for a ride downhill.
So let me not judge for I know not good from bad.

Anyway two Swedish men, adults around 40 years of age, have been caught by the local law-enforcers. Drunk in charge of two motorised lawnmowers. They were speeding to the pub.
They said that they were not in good condition to drive a car.
The police were not impressed.

Rumour has it that it was the wives that telephoned the police to tip them off.

Swedish women never had a decent sense of humour.....

MALE MEMBERS MAKING A COME-BACK
I guess it all started for the Brits when Hadrians´ Wall was plastered with phallic symbols ( too big they were) and the Roman Empire was sussed.
But male members are making a come back it seems.
Can´t say too much yet as I still have a few house-points to get back after the Mid-Summer frolics.

JULY 4th
Me missus has ordered me to shut up and say nothing.
So here I am saying nothing.
Wise missus she is.

CAMPING STANDARDS FOR NULABOR CONFERENCES ( get togethers)

07.00 Cooks aroused
07.30 Campers aroused
08.15 Breakfast
08.30 Washing-up, cleaning and airing of the bedding
10.00 Inspection, flag break ; prayers
10.15 Activities
13.00 Light lunch
14.00 Activities
17.30 Tea and biscuits
19.00 Dinner followed by free time
20.30 Camp fire and yarns and story telling ; songs
21.30 Prayers ( followed by a hot drink, soup or cocoa )
22.00 Lights out ( silence)

CAMPING STANDARDS... And ....
Dishes for main meals.

Breakfast
Porridge, Cornflakes, etc
Bacon
Sausages-fried....
Eggs - boiled ; scrambled.....
Fish - Kippers, Haddocks.....
Raw or stewed fruit

Lunch
Potted Meat
Pressed Beef
Cheese...........

AND for the Sweets : Suet Roll and Syrup or Sultana Roll.

MY FATHER LEFT TO ME
Many things, of course, but one springs back to mind right now.
He said to me :-
" Always be careful of two things. Slicky dicks and slippy dips."
He was an old Labourite.

WHY RONNIE BIGGS SHOULD BE SET FREE
The adventurer Ronnie Biggs should be set free with two conditions :-
a) He tells us all he knows about Sir Mark Thatcher the snatcher, and,
b) Makes daily raids upon the Daily Mail.

CAN ANYBODY REMEMBER
Just what Karl Marx said about the relationship between the law of the land and the power-elite?

USELESS THOSE PR PEOPLE
Just got sent a few pairs of David Beckham underpants for a trial and for a review.
Much too small I replied before giving them away to the Budgie.

PAGEN FESTIVAL - ENJOYED IT I DID
Loved the Mid-Summer Festival time. Actually I was rather well behaved but I guess that is relative.
But damn it me budget for the month is shot to pieces.
The banks refuse to even grant me a power-breakfast meeting and I really must get back in the swing of things soon.
Maybe I should reply to the request from Sir Mark Thatcher. I was asked to help in a charitable expedition to Ethiopia and get paid well back for it.
Dear Maggi : What can I do?

GOOD MORNING HUN PUN WRONG
As midsummer arrives and the Finnish festivals begin I cannot say too much or too little. Good morning to football fans and good morning to creative political careerists.
Well that is about it right now - off to re-join the party.

NOW TEACHED(ed) AT HARVARD BUSINESS SCHOOL
" Charge for your expertise... Many companies fail to place a premium on the real dollar worth their expertise, or what it would cost an outsider to learn what they already know..............".