BREAKING WIND-E-NEWS
After our beloved Anticant and Merkin were shortlisted for the Paul Foot Award for 2007 it is rumoured, in high heavy circles, that Szwagi is well up for nominations for 2008.
Would like to say more but at this stage the gagging order is enforced.
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Both wine and bread at confirmation were fake and this small site might just attract others that experienced the same. Critical voices? Those that participate? Who knows. For those that find sympathy with a walk on the wild sides of life, mountains, rivers or forests but do not pretend to escape. Other bits and pieces the news and also odds and sods that cry out "leave it off mate". Justly a lark and maybe the lark. But the lark will often land on the cactus.
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7 comments:
Hopefully, that is not the Paul Foot in the Mouth Award.
A'noon all. Not I, surely. Modest Mussorgsky forbids, and all that. Or perhaps I'm in the running for being silent for so long.
That'd learn me.
Will this win the Paul Foot Award?
Searching for plausible explanations of Zola's recent painfully long absence, I came up with the following droll tale. Any resemblance to real-life or blogosphere characters is entirely coincidental. [Disclaimer inserted on lawyers' advice]:
Zola was excited about his new rifle and decided to try bear hunting. He travelled up to northern Lapland, spotted a small brown bear, and shot it. Soon after there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear.
The black bear said, "That was a very bad mistake. That was my cousin. I'm going to give you two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have sex." After considering briefly, Zola decided to accept the latter alternative. So the black bear had his way with Zola.
Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Zola soon recovered and vowed revenge.
He headed out on another trip to northern Lapland where he found the black bear and shot it dead. Soon after, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him.
The grizzly said, "That was a big mistake, Zola. That was my cousin and you've got two choices: Either I maul you to death or we have ‘rough sex’."
Again, Zola thought it was better to cooperate with the grizzly bear than be mauled to death. So the grizzly had his way with Zola.
Although he survived, it took several months before Zola fully recovered.
Now Zola was completely outraged, so he headed back to northern Lapland and managed to track down the grizzly bear and shot it. He felt sweet revenge; but then, moments later, there was a tap on his shoulder.
He turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there.
The polar bear gave him a quizzical look and said, "Admit it Zola, you don't come here just for the hunting, do you?"
I think I told the assemblage the Polish version of that joke some time ago.
Still, no joke like an old joke.
And no Zola like our Zola!
"Still, no joke like an old joke."
Mother-in-law ones, then a few of them ones about animals walking into bars, barman says etc. Maybe round it off with a couple of Englishman-Irishman-Scotsman ones ...
That's how my gagging order would go.
I will av you know I have lots of Greek money after my affair with a Rhino soreass, as they say.
Beware of gifts me old(s).
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