All ABOUT FOOTBALL
That old "BOLDSCOT" has been at me agin. Demands more chat about football. He talks of a hero, Jim Baxter, who was in the bar boozing when he should have been playing. He talks of his opportunity on the pitch as Baxter gets pissed. How true to life and how wonderful. Jim Baxter was one of the best "half-back" players ever to be on display and he rates in any world top twenty. Like a good football player he liked his booze. Rugby players only tried to keep up. But our very own "BOLDSCOT" went onto the field and replaced his hero with himself and all this through popular demand. The rumour is that he did very well. BoldScot remembers it still today after all those years. To stand in for a hero is wonderful and a working class hero is something to be.
Had a similar experience myself once. To stand in the shoes of a hero is ........... let us just say memorable.
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Both wine and bread at confirmation were fake and this small site might just attract others that experienced the same. Critical voices? Those that participate? Who knows. For those that find sympathy with a walk on the wild sides of life, mountains, rivers or forests but do not pretend to escape. Other bits and pieces the news and also odds and sods that cry out "leave it off mate". Justly a lark and maybe the lark. But the lark will often land on the cactus.
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27 comments:
BoldScot has asked me to ignore any wicked comments about Scotland as such.
Also no idle chat about ladies from Inverness. No virgins there.
No Rugby songs and no religion.
Shit what else do we have to talk about I ask?
Football OK.
Sex *and* catholicism?
Surely you meant 'or'?
I hope, with all this talk of football, that the terraces here are not going to now resound to the chants of a thousand drunken fans.
Plus, who will sweep the detritus out of the stadium if there is no resident Beadle here?.
Oh Well....
First it is implied that i am inane...and now possibly detritus.
I don't care.
I'm free.
Listen, wee man, we don't need a Beadle here - we look after our own Security. Any obs?. Gude.
I never did like the work, or opinions, of John Lennon.
I'd only think about cleaning out the stadium if the Geiger counter ever went off the scale. Anything less than that, though, and, personally, I'd recommend playing on. Detritus and all.
Bourgeois landlords might not like this; where going 'off topic' seems to be a crime worse than wearing shoes in the house. There are worse things in life, though, than our prole-ification of weapons of mass distraction from time to time.
One would have to know an awful lot about the world, and all the connections between things therein, to judge something as simply 'off topic'.
Right, that's it!. Pack your bags, the lot of you.
Out. Now. And don't come back.
(Exit : running off to count the spoons)
Hey Diddle Diddle........
(Exit : running off to count the spoons)
...
before embarking on a quest, which will end only three months later; when Bourgeois Landlord finally finds the fish they had sewn into the hem of his Laura Ashley curtains before they left.
A few years later I played as a 'ringer' for a team that included another legendary figure Jim Brogan (4 caps).
Two things remain with me.
At the first opposition corner I set about organising the less experienced players.
Instead Brogan shouted 'fuck off, out of the box - the lot of you - this is ma baw'. We duly fucked off as the opponents put everyone into the box.
Ball comes over, Brogan steamrollers through the pack and clears the ball - having elbowed the opposition number nine.
Giant Striker started to retaliate and then thought better of it after Brogan shouted 'I wisnae scared of Derek Dougan and I'm no scared of a fuckin' wanker like you'.
Very professional, I thought.
Second memory happened later in the game. I had been having a running battle with the opposition number four (this game was a 'grudge match' it appeared).
At one point I hit him with an outrageous tackle which was reinforced by my best mate following in.
The right-half ended up somewhere in the grandstand and we ended up on the ground. This was a bit unusual as, being Baxter mentored, I could hardly tackle a fish supper. My friend likewise.
Brogan came over and picked us up by the collars, saying, 'Calm down boys - yer no playing in the European Cup, now'.
Calm down?. Did we fuck.
Bold Scott : You never played against me. Would have taught you a big lesson I would.
But Jim Baxter was great.
Shame that he was a Scot.
What kinds of sporty things do you lot get up to I ask?
Football? NO.
Bunch of old paper-tigers methinks.
Climbing?
The Boldscot Arts Martially from time to time. Sometimes outdoors, even.
Rest of the time, purely indoor pursuits ie Sex and Drink and Rock'n'Roll.
http://geobay.com/4978cb
"Sporty things", zola? You blaspheme! On your own site, too. To the sin bin with you.
Perhaps, I should send Zola a photograph?.
If he ever played football against me, I would reckon he only saw the back of my jersey.
Still.
ZoZo....
whose shoes did you stand in........
or is that a question too far?
Boldscot : your would be correct there. before you even touched the ball you would have ad yer legs bitten and ended up face down ont gras.
Norman Hunter was my hero and Nobby Stiles too.
BTW : the ref would have been out of view and a powerless as the infamous beadle to moderate.
Football is serious, never nice.
No question is too far for you lavenderloo.
Once a certain chairman of a certain national bank arrived at heathrow airport as pissed as a duck. Shame that he was due to talk at a rather VIP event.
I tried to sober him up. nearly managed. But when I thought he was sleeping he was not he was running a bath in his hotel room. Then he slept and the bath water ran and ran and ran. Water through the floor and hotel people less than happy.
Anyway I gave his "speech" in the evening and needed to waffle and hiffle and piffle to survive.
Got that guy back however.
Next day a meeting at the Savoy hotel in London was on the agenda.
I called off and left this VIP guy with the little ford escort car.
I went off with the merc elsewhere.
I was told that he was rather humbled to arrive at such a place with such a car.
Did I laugh?
would that I could have been the Parking Lot Attendant on such an occasion...........
Oh, well done ZoZo.......!
Yes and thanks LB : But was a twist. I was "told off" for my act by a few of the creepy sorts and underlings.
Some years later i found myself in a hotel with my family. Went down for a late breakfast with my then young son. Met the chairman again. he came over to our table and bought my son the biggest ice cream available and demanded to pay my bill.
What can be made of that i ask.
That you are a Better Man than I am, Gunga Din.
Morning,ZoZo........!
Good afternoon LB : Tennis today?
I've given it the elbow.
Hope you used some grease.
Like Lightning, ZoZoBear
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